3am

a bit of advice

Photobucket
chicago


A BIT OF ADVICE

if you happen to see
an idiot
moving at top speed,
best to get out of their way…there is no bigger fool
than the fool who follows one.

never tie your anchor
to a sinking ship.

never look down on people
unless you are willing to help them up.

age gracefully,

but also
humorously.

an old man once told me that
rainy days are best for sleeping
and making love…

any of the above pieces of information,
taken in part or in whole,
will help you see the world
in ways that will enlighten
you more than you know.

live it. because as a result of everything
you’ve done to this moment: THIS IS IT

make sure you are creating your future
with every breath you take...
3am

just a thought

Photobucket
south haven; MI

JUST A THOUGHT

it's important
to take yourself out for a walk
now and then.

just walk as far out
and away from home...then sit.

watch what happens to you
as
the sun sets
on the horizon...
3am

evelyn

Photobucket
evelyn at dempster beach; evanston, IL
*taken with LG camera phone*

waiting patiently
for me to get the kite in to the sky...ha ha ~
3am

got to get east of the sun

Photobucket
saugatuck; MI

GOT TO GET EAST OF THE SUN

it never fails.

when i'm at the grocery store,
the person in front of me
always has some customer service issue
which requires a manager intervention
after long drawn out explanations
by the clerk as to why strawberries
are .10 more then they were 18 years ago.

a simple trip to ronald mcdonald's
or the burger king
always includes some lady counting
out $4.82 in pennies
and nickels
only to find out she's 6 cents short.

when i ask for a burger,
no pickles,
no cheese,
the cashier always asks,
"do you want cheese on that?"

"no pickles,
no cheese"
i'll say.

then. the burger arrives. no cheese,
but extra pickles. of course.

then
there are the bad drivers. the bad
cops (talking on their cell phones
as they run through red lights
and neighborhood stop signs),
and the bad
moods
from half assed service clerks
trying to sell me wireless internet
over the phone.

life can be a real bitch
if you let it creep up on you
that way.

there's plenty
to be pissed about
when you look out the window
and think about it.

rising gas prices,
lower satisfactions...

black on black crime. white collar
corruption. back street drug deals
and top 10 radio
that gets worse with each passing week.

every now and then
i find myself just east
of the sun though.

the colors
of the sky shine just right.

"have a nice day"
someone will say to me. and for once
i'll notice that it really is.

"same to you"
i might say,
"the very same to you..."

and i'll walk out on to the sidewalk
with my bag of goods...not even wondering
how long it's all going to last.
3am

more and more

Photobucket
south haven; michigan

MORE AND MORE

more and more
i get the feeling that when it's all over
things will be much the same as when we were here.

too much undiscovered beauty
and never enough appreciation for the things we'd found.

basically,
when it's all said and done
there will be much more to be said and done...ha ha.

even now
my guess is that 85% of the earth's population
lives
as if they finally realize
that THIS IS IT. a certain acceptance
that the only magic that ever existed
was imagined
in the follies of youth.

less than 1% of the people you meet
truly savor
their life...and more importantly
their surroundings. a slow,
easy savoring as it all unfolds. even
when it folds the wrong way.

that 1% fully realize
that the people
who seem to dislike them
are simply trying to change them. they
have an understanding of the places
they should not be. and this matters
well,
because they shrug off
disasterous situations
and people in ways that count.

the rest fall in to varying degrees
of denial
and mild,
yet functional psychosis.

you are safest
when hanging with either
the 85% crowd
or the 1% crowd.

skip the rest.

because when it's all said
and done
you will hopefully
have done more than most,

or accepted your limitations with grace.

discover
all you can along the way. but don't
go looking for it.

let it flow in to you
as easy as a sunset,
or a soft rush of water
just drifting on by.

more and more
i get the feeling that when it's
all over, you and i will be standing there. grinning. and
staring at simple beauty
in ways we could have
never

possibly

imagined.

patience. it's easing towards us
even now...
3am

no need to fake life so seriously

Photobucket
chicago

NO NEED TO FAKE LIFE SO SERIOUSLY

i don't have anything to prove.

in fact,
if i did,
i did it a long time ago. and what i display
every day is a now scaled back,
slowed down version
of my former versions,

which were always recycled
and revised to meet ever changing pychological demands.

wiser,

but just a little weaker
with each passing year.

it's OK by me though. i believe i have better
stamina now. expending less energy,

preserving the bursts for the
moments that count - ha ha...

when i meet a group of new people,
i believe something is subtracted from my overall being. so i tend
to stick to the crowds i know, the places
i frequent,
and the faces i am all too familiar with.

the most beautiful women
i've met
have often been the most insecure.

the most handsome of men
have often been the most evil...or so dumb
that their effects delivered
evil, disgusting results.

i like simple people. beautiful
on the inside first.

the other kinds can continue
their lives of
fanciful despair. corroding
their surroundings
as they boast of their pomp
and circumstance.

i say there's no need to
fake life so seriously. no need
to mask shortcomings
with big words
and disguised failures.

grow what's inside. or the things
you already know.

the rest will take care of itself. and when it doesn't,
the reality will be that there is
more to learn. less to fake.

and a hell of a lot more fun
to be had
when you have an idea
where you are going
and know just where
you've been.
3am

from russia, with love (rainy changes)

Photobucket
over chicago

FROM RUSSIA, WITH LOVE (RAINY CHANGES)

she's an older woman
from russia...telling me bits of her story.

"i come to chicago
in 1997. i leave my husband. i leave my family. i think
to start again in america."

but another marriage soon after her arrival
left her exactly where she was running from.

no husband. little money. and fewer options.

"my american husband
was a bum! he drink. he mean to me. he tell me 'you work'. i tell him
'WHAT I CAN DO? I AM NOT AMERICAN!'"

she tells me she quickly left him. married for less
than a year before she ventured out on her own again.

now she's too old to start over
and too young to retire.

"12 more years i retire. and i want it to hurry. but that is wrong. no one
should want hurry get old."

i sip my coffee and look out the window. i understand her somehow.

i have a few years left in my own window. if i am to start over
it has to be now. i'd hate to reach an age where i just wish to hurry
and get old. i want life to last. to stretch it out
as long as possible.

there is hope in change. and there is defeat in stagnation.

being smart is the tricky part. knowing
when to hold

when to fold

and when to run
comes not only with an open mind
but with enough cash to pull you through.

i look out the window once more. it's getting dark. rainy too...

i sure as hell don't plan on running to russia...ha ha. but
i do plan to start again.

something terrifying
and exciting in the thoughts of it all.

in life we can do the right thing
or we can do nothing.

but eventually we must all do what is required
or we'll wither in the wind.

the rain is getting stronger now. but somehow,
so is my resolve.

there is always more to the story.