milwaukee art museum; WI
i mostly wander around. always have.
it's amazing i've made it this far.
when i was a kid
i'd get sent out to the yard to pull weeds
and end up looking for four leaf clovers. my mind is more apt
to focus in on the moment
than to think about the future
or the past.
i might know for sure if this is working for me,
but i can't remember what's happened
and i cannot see what will be.
fucking has always been the most perfect
waste of time for me. and sleeping is a close 2nd.
everything else is just a path to getting back to bed. with
or without my lover.
i stand up. cross the room. reach in to the fridge for a glass of milk.
i wonder what happened to lara botinelli. and i KNOW what happened
to elise geiger. amy tuesday too. none of them are here now,
and it's all for the better.
i sip my milk. it is quiet. only the sound of the refrigerator humming.
every day people die for nothing. the same ways they have lived.
and the ugly continue to need each other
in order to feed their hate.
and although santa clause doesn't exist
i certainly wish he did. he represents all that ever made sense to me,
minus the jolly red suit,
i wander back to bed
and dream of four leaf clovers
as the rest of the world
makes their way to work.
it's a wonder any of us make it anywhere...the view goes on and on.